Palpa

There is a Buddhist thought that roughly says, living in the past breeds depression, living in the future breeds anxiety, and living in the present is where you will find peace. I have found this thought to be especially meaningful since coming to Nepal. At home I often set a detailed schedule for myself and have a clear vision of the future, whether it be the next season, week, day, or hour… I almost always have half of my being caught up in the prospect of the future. Here, however, I have been able to find peace. I am not completely engaging in the present, but more so than ever I can find happiness with what is in front of me and be content with what I am doing in the moment.

When I first arrived, it wasn’t love at first sight, but every single day I have grown to love Nepal more and more. The more I see and understand, the more I love it here. It wouldn’t make since to come to Nepal for a short term, unless you were with an incredible guide, because it takes time to understand and appreciate the surrounding beauty (especially outside of the rolling hills). But even in the city, where I have had an incessant cough from the pollution, it smells like feces, there are children with missing limbs, and potholes to avoid with every other step—there is also beauty. There is beauty in the people, in the unit of time that is perceived (as Nepali time), in the distant hills (that would certainly be categorized as mountains anywhere else in the world), in the colors and sounds of music (not so much in the horns and dogs barking that can serve as a distraction at times), in the living tradition and the love and respect for others and nature alike. I have been dabbling with a peculiar balance; I don’t think every aspect of Nepali culture is beautiful, there is also marginalization, misunderstanding, and neglect deeply embedded in social normalcy (but so is the case anywhere I suppose)… but I guess am finding that it is good to be critical of these things because it makes the pleasant things that much more satisfying.

Driving out to Palpa last Monday, I was completely struck by the amazing views; it was a similar feeling to that which I felt flying in. The towering mountains saturated with thick green forest above, and a rushing river so powerful that it has cut through the mountains and created an incredible valley, below. During the drive I was definitely at peace and appreciating the present moments.

On the hike to the community forest group

On the second day in Palpa, we visited a community radio station and a community forestry group. At the community radio station I had my first interaction with a local NGO, and quickly discovered the affects that Nepali culture has on an organization’s management. In Nepal, the word “no” doesn’t really exist, and it is difficult to get a straight answer, from anyone. I found it difficult to ask probing questions, especially if there was even a slight negative connotation or if it hinted at critical inquiry. It was clear, however, that the staff all had big hearts and seemed to be working for a good cause. This station is actually the first community radio station in South Asia and made huge claims such as poverty reduction, decreased marginalization, women’s empowerment, etc. (The presentation did not do a very good job backing up any of these claims, however.) Later, we visited a community forestry user group after a hike through the forest. I felt an overwhelming sense of community in this meeting and connected much better to the work that this group was implementing compared to the previous group. Each of the executives of the Community Forestry group is a volunteer (who lives in the community and reaps the benefits of the forest as well). When I asked how they were able to balance their real jobs with the care and upkeep they provide for the forest, they responded as if that was never a question…the forest is like the community’s shared child, there is always someone looking over it and no matter what it is taken care of. Unlike other community forestry groups, this one has never experienced any issues with stealing and in fact, they do not have anyone guarding the forest, ever. 102 families currently work with and benefit from this forest in particular.

Each evening after we came back from our fieldwork expeditions, we would have a group-wide debrief. I found these conversations to be extremely effective and in fact, the next day (after our first debrief) the group as a whole was asking better, more insightful questions. Not only is Anil (who is the brilliant head teacher I have mentioned before) trying to probe us to ask more questions, but to also walk through the issues and determine prescriptive paths for the problems we point out. I was surprised by the lack of communication, people trying to dominate the conversation, and/or genuine disagreements that we had in the group during most of our evening debriefs. My program-mates are from very different academic background, the only overlap being two geology majors and two anthropology majors!

Dhaka Weaving

The next day (and I will try to be more brief now), we went to a soil conservation district office. This group works to keep ecological balance and maintain the land’s productivity. Honestly, I was unimpressed by the obvious bureaucratic mumble jumble and the lack of productive action. We also went to a Dhaka weaving factory, the first in Nepal. Dhaka is a beautiful fabric that is traditionally hand woven and made into ties, scarves, kurtas, saris, etc. This organization has had a really natural evolution into supporting women’s empowerment and economic growth.

The next day we played Frisbee!! So, every morning I would run to the top of this mountain and it was so beautiful, some mornings, when it was clear enough, I could see the Himalayas! But from the fourth day onward myself and at least 10 other people met down on the local field and played Frisbee before breakfast! 6 of the 18 people on my program play college ultimate and it was so amazing waking up, going for a run, and then scrimmaging all before 8am. That day for language class (which is usually spent in the classroom) we ventured out on the town and were asked to interview someone about what they like to do, where they are originally from, their profession, and anything else really. It is pretty incredible how conversational everyone is after less than a month of studying the language.

View from my run

Frisbee!

For our field excursion on the fourth day, we went to a mother’s group and had lunch and learned about the community organizing that they do. We had an unexpected encounter with dancing and interpersonal relationship building that I found refreshing after so many hours of lectures and being spoken at. Going to the mother’s group helped me understand and develop tactics for breaking down the barrier between the observer and the observed. On this day, at the mother’s group, I finally developed a clearer understanding of why I came to Nepal, this is perception that I never quite probed at enough during my time in India… I have been asked many times why I travel to foreign places to study, why that is necessary, is it a good use of resources (the latter is something I also interrogate within myself often)… I am finding how truly important it is to understand people and social change from a bottom up approach. I think coming to this conclusion will help me with my independent study here, where I will research to understand a top-down approach and test it from the bottom up.

I want to develop an interpersonal understanding of Nepal. That is why I need to devote time to studying the language, so I can come closer to breaking down the barrier between us and them and foster relationships that are built on understanding. I completely understand that many of the problems with marginalization and poverty and whatnot are issues in the U.S. as well, but I still think that it is crucial (even if I settle down in the US) for me to be able to develop these relationships cross-culturally, plus that is so exciting for me.

The important thing is that I do justice with the information that I obtain. I wonder though, if just 4 months is enough time to understand the local culture and to have organic interactions.

I previously reflected on the fact that it was frustrating at times to be in a place that felt so familiar… that maybe I didn’t fully step out of my comfort zone. But suddenly I am so incredibly grateful for my time traveling and spending time in India because it has allowed me to take a different position here in Nepal. I am still guilty of being a “looky loo” tourist at times, but being here doesn’t feel so incredibly foreign and so instead of being shocked by or feeling the need to point out the strange, I am able to embrace Nepal’s uniqueness; I find beauty in what is strange or different… and I can feel my peers approaching that point as well. I find that I don’t need to assign a value to everything I witness, but can be content with a neutral understanding of what is idiosyncratic within Nepal.

The other stops we made throughout the week that got my thoughts going were to a coffee co-op and a local hospital. Being in a village the function of gender, caste, and development became especially apparent. Foreign women are oftentimes considered honorary men. It can be a frustrating position because we are given power to an extent, but I am lost knowing whether or not that empowerment should be validated or if it is just adding to the discomfort I feel with the whole “guest is god” notion. Are we adding to the disparity between the elite and the poor, or female and male even? …to be interrogated further.

The group with our jeeps

View from my run... Himalayas in the background!